Many content creators have traded their minimum wage jobs to go full-time on TikTok. Spencer, most famously known on TikTok as @spencewuah, left Starbucks to become a content creator. In this episode, he joins The Bunny Barbie to share that transition and how life has been for him since then. Tackling the challenges that come with fame, they talk about how friendships change, both the good and the bad, online and offline personas, and more. They also discuss how COVID has shifted everything, when best to post, how to gain confidence and learn to love yourself. Join Spencer and The Bunny Barbie in this fun conversation you don’t want to miss!
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From Starbucks To Full-Time Content Creator With @Spencewuah’s Spencer
I’m excited. It has been long since I talked to you last.
The last time we talked, it was me getting stranded in a hotel room, getting back home, midterms and finals. I was getting flooded.
You were still working at Starbucks the last time I talked to you on the phone.
I’m gone from there now. I left. Thank God.
I’m sure you’re able to support yourself from TikTok?
Luckily there’s a creator fund so I’m able to make the same amount of money I made while working a minimum wage job, which is enough for me. I’m grateful that I don’t need to work at Starbucks anymore. It was too much.
I’m surprised you don’t make more than that. I go to your page and every video has millions and millions of views.
It varies depending on every person, but I was college online, working full-time, I was working close to 30 to 40 hours a week and I was like, “I can’t do this anymore.” Thank God I’m out of there.
What happened with your Wi-Fi? Is everything good at your house?
It’s good. My house is getting renovated. I live in a duplex and the renovators who are renovating next door, while they were putting up the wall and doing all the outlets, cut through the cable wire, the wire was hanging out in the middle of the road. The cops had to come and pull the wire to the other side of the road, but when this happened, it was also during COVID. COVID was big. The cable company had let go of many people, a lot of people weren’t working. We couldn’t get anyone to our house for 2, 3 weeks.
I remember you were in the hotel for a long time because you had assignments and everything too.
The main reason I went to the hotel was that at first, I was able to connect my phone to a hotspot and connect that to my computer so I could do everything. I’m the type of person who has 30 tabs open at a time. My phone was not able to help my laptop keep 30 tabs open. Eventually, my mom was like, “I’m going to book you a hotel room.”
How do you stay motivated to stay in college?
I don’t, I’m not joking. If it were up to me, I would have been out of college already. The main reason why I’m still there is that my mom, she got her Associate’s degree, but she never went for her Bachelor’s so my mom has been drilling it in me, all the time, like, “Spencer, you need to get your Bachelor’s degree. You have to get a degree. Even if it’s something that you don’t want to do, get it so you have a degree.” I’m like, “I don’t want to.” My mom would rather me get a tattoo than drop out of college.
Especially because you said they helped you pay for it and stuff too.
I’m in college on a scholarship. I got nice grades in high school. I’m going to college for free.Don't invest time in a friendship where they're not there for you. Click To Tweet
You’re still continuing that you have to pay for.
I get my first because I go to community college. It’s a two-tiered program. If you go to a community and you keep your grades up, they’ll pay for you to go to a university in New Jersey, but I’m not doing that. I’m getting my two years free at community college, transferring to online and flying my ass out to LA. I hate the East Coast much.
I’m excited for you to be in LA. I can’t wait to see. You’re moving in with two people?
No. I’m moving in with Zaya. We were supposed to fly out in January, but then COVID, it’s still big. We don’t want to get on any planes. We don’t want to put anyone else at risk. We also know that if we fly out to LA and we have friends there, they’re going to want to see us. We’re going to have to hold it off. We’re waiting until February 2021, but even then we don’t know, because we’re not too sure of what Biden is going to mandate, even though every state has to, he can recommend each state to be like, “Close off your borders, six-week quarantine.” Both of our states are like, “You have to stay home.” We can’t go.
It’s good not paying rent if you can’t even get there.
That’s what we were saying too. God forbid, we flew out there, signed the lease, got back home and got stuck in a six-week quarantine. We’ll be paying for a month of rent and we wouldn’t even be living there.
Do you know where you want to move to?
Our friend Emmy lives in downtown LA, close to the University of Southern California. We were in that area. I’m sure it’s called Little Tokyo. That’s a nice area. There are a lot of cute shops. We were looking in that general area because we also know a lot of people who live in that area too. It’s not like we’re going to be away from our friends, and we want our first apartment together, because we know that we’re not going to be stuck in this apartment forever like a trial run. While we’re there, we want to get acclimated to the area. It’s easier to be in an area where you have a lot of friends so they can show us around.
I’ve lived in LA on and off. I’ve only been to downtown LA twice. Once was for a modeling shoot, and the other one was for a wedding. I was like a baby. I was probably 20, 21.
You still look 21. It’s not fair. “I was such a baby. I was 21.”
People are like, “How’s your Botox?” I’m like, “I have nothing on my forehead. It looks good. I’m shiny.”
Sometimes I’m like, “Spencer, never smile again so you don’t have wrinkles. Don’t frown, don’t smile.”
I know you’re going to get the smile lines because you’re screaming all the time.
I already know, and I’m such a giggly person. I find everything funny. I’m always smiling. If I have any wrinkles, I want the smile wrinkles. Those are cute on old people and I would rock them well.
You need to keep your skin moisturized. You’ll be good.
I moisturize. What’s your skincare routine?
I only use three products and I use this eye cream, from Perricone MD, but my eyes are sensitive, that’s why I use that. I use the SkinCeuticals age and blemish defense. It’s a serum, it’s expensive, but it’s good. It lasts a long time. The only thing I find annoying is that it’s in a glass bottle and every time I travel, it breaks. I waste $100 every time I go somewhere. I put it in a travel container, and it dries out. I don’t know. It’s annoying. SkinCeuticals needs to get it together. I use an anti-aging moisturizer from Algenist. What do you use?
They have an Ordinary Toner. I use it every other day. You see Ordinary Toner. I use Paula’s Choice exfoliant. I moisturize with Aloe. I have so much I do. I put castor oil on my eyelashes, but then at night this is my secret and I tell people about it and no one ever takes my recommendation. There’s this product called Differin gel. You used to have to be prescribed to take it, but now it’s over the counter and it’s the strongest acne medication treatment that you can get. When I first started using it, my skin was flaky. My skin will dry out easily.
Is it retinol?
I have no idea. I got it because my one friend was like, “Spencer, you have to try it. It works wonders.” I was like, “Bullshit.” They’re like, “No, you need to try it.” I started trying it and I told them, I was like, “My skin is flaky.” My friend was like, “Use less of it. Build up to using more and your skin is going to start glowing.” In the light, this isn’t a highlight.
Do you use it every night?
I use the toner and exfoliant that I use every other day or every 2 to 3 days, but the Differin gel, I use religiously every night.
I bet it’s retinol. It sounds like retinol.
It might be, I’m pretty sure. When I use it, it comes in a tiny tube. I feel the reason why people are like, “It’s expensive, but there’s only this much in it.” You need a drop. It goes everywhere.
What would you describe your aesthetic as that people wanted to know?
Someone asked me that and I was thinking about it. I made a name for it when I was younger. I call it a shoebox aesthetic because when I was little, I used to collect things and throw them in a shoebox. I pick things up from every kind of aesthetic and I’m like, “I’ll try to make it work.” I call it my shoebox aesthetic because I grab things from everywhere.
What do you wear on a daily basis or it changes?
On a daily basis, a hoodie and sweats, but if I’m out with my friends, I wear jeans, maybe a turtleneck, a flannel or sometimes a trench.
Do you wear skirts or dresses out?
It’s cold. I didn’t get into wearing skirts until over the summer. I wish I hadn’t, but now it’s cold outside, I am freezing all the time. I have an iron deficiency. My fingers are always cold.Now that everyone's constantly on their phone, it doesn't matter when you post to get interactions. Click To Tweet
Did you see the viral TikTok? I saw it, with the lady who cooked her feet by putting them near a heater.
Did she cook them?
She said it feels normal, but she was sat with a heater on her feet. This is why I’m never going to live anywhere where it’s cold. She sat with a heater on her feet every day and her skin, she cooked the outside of it.
That’s why I’m moving to California because in New Jersey, it’s freezing. My friend Emmy, we FaceTime, and she was like, “It’s cold outside. It’s 60 degrees.” I looked at her, I was like, “It is 30 degrees outside. Do not complain. I am freezing my ass off.” It snowed here.
I’m not ready, but it’s warmer than usual?
There’s this one week every year, right before December, especially in the Northeast. It’s 1 to 2 weeks where it will be cold for a month and right before Christmas, it’s like, “Let’s get warm.” Next week, there’s going to be ice on everyone’s car. It’s going to be snowing.
It’s annoying because it goes from snow and then it melts, it gets to ice. It’s dangerous everywhere.
That’s what sucks about it, especially when we have snowstorms in New Jersey, I will wake up at 3:00 AM with my mom and we will shovel the driveway. If you don’t shovel it on time, the top layer is soft, but the bottom becomes a thick layer of ice. When I move out to California, I’m never ever. I’ll come back for holidays like, “Hi, fam.” You will not catch me in New Jersey or New York.
Do you think your mom will move on to LA eventually?
No. My mom is a Jersey girl. She loves New Jersey. I told my mom that I was flying out there, and my mom was super supportive of me as long as I continued my college education. I was telling her, I was like, “Do you ever plan on moving?” My mom was like, “No, I love New Jersey. I grew up here.” I also think it’s partly because my grandparents are buried in New Jersey. My mom likes to visit them from time to time. I go to a cemetery and if she moved away, she wouldn’t be able to see them as often, even though they passed.
She could go back on holidays too.
My mom always loved the East Coast. I was asking her where she’s traveled to before, and she’s like, “I’ve been to the Bahamas. I’ve been here and here.” I was like, “Have you ever been to California?” She’s like, “Nope. I have no need to go out there.” I’m like, “I’m moving there. You might want to come to visit.”
I saw your post on your story, which made me think of you, that you’ve lost a lot of friends from your platform. Do you want to talk about that?
It’s hard to explain because you hit milestones when you’re doing online influencing and you want to tell your friends about your achievements. I would, but some of my friends would be like, “Why is this the only thing you’ve talked about?” I’m like, “It’s not. I wanted to let you know.” There are also instances where I feel at a certain point, no longer looked at me as a friend and more a person who has a platform. I remember they would reach out to me and be like, “You should do an Instagram Live and invite me,” or “We should make a TikTok together.”
It’s come from you being friends with Spencer to you wanting to be friends with Spencewuah. I’m like, “You’re viewing them as two different people. I’m the same person.” It’s weird because some of my friends would be sick of me being like, “Sorry, I can’t FaceTime right now. I have to make a video quick.” They’d be like, “Don’t call.” Other friends of mine were like, “Let’s make videos together.” This is only a thing. Especially people that I was friends with in high school, who I lost contact with. This one girl reached out to me and was like, “How do I edit my videos? Can we hang out and you can show me how you make your videos?” I’m like, “We talked in high school and the minute we got into college, you cut off all ties with me, and now all of a sudden, I have a platform. If that’s the only thing you want to talk about, I don’t want to invest time in a friendship where you’re not there for me. You’re there for my social media.” It’s many different reasons.
It’s strange because I’m older too, a lot of people have been jealous. I’ve lost some friends over people who had more of a platform than me on Instagram maybe, or a similar platform than me on Instagram. They’re upset and they’re like, “I don’t understand why you’re putting your life out there.” I’m like, “I don’t even share that much about my life.”
I talk about you to my friends because we were doing a show and I was on FaceTime with them, I was even saying like, “I’m doing a show with Bunny and I’m super excited. I love her videos because she’s open about herself.” If people were trying to jump to assumptions, they wouldn’t be able to. You’re open strictly about yourself and who you are as a person, but you’re not open about your entire life. You’re open about your personality, who you are, what defines who you are. That’s why when you followed me back, I was like, “Bunny.” We were talking and then two weeks later, I’m trapped in a hotel room.
I remember too, we were talking and you were like, “You live on the water?” I was like, “Yes.” I assume people know that about me, but it’s funny because I don’t post about it.
I remember that because we were on FaceTime and that’s another thing, I didn’t know you lived on the water. I feel no one would know that. When you showed me, I was like, “What?”
Do you think as you get older, it’s going to be harder for you to make friends that aren’t creators or have their own social media?
It’s already hard, especially when it comes to relationships outside of friendship. I have made many amazing friends off of social media. A lot of my friends are influencers which makes me grateful. I can talk to them about things that they completely understand, but also, making friends is difficult because I have this wall up and I’ve said this in my life before too. You never know if people are there for Spencer or Spencewuah. That’s even with relationships too. I remember two opposite examples. This one guy I talked to that stopped talking to me because he found out I had TikTok and he was intimidated by my platform. This other guy stopped talking to me because he knew I had to TikTok, I said his name in the video and I stopped talking to him because he got DMs on Instagram and was like, “You need to make more videos about me because I love receiving DMs. Maybe I should make a TikTok too and you can duet me.” Now that I’m on social media, there are many different ways relationships can go sour because of my social media.
They also know much about you before getting to know you.
That’s the crazy thing too because I feel at the same exact time, a lot of the times when I get into relationships with people who know about my TikTok, after we hang out a few times they’re like, “You’re completely different than what I thought you would be.” My online persona is completely different from who I am out in the public eye. Online, I’m outgoing because I can be. I’m alone in my room, I can do what I want to do online, but the minute I’m out in public, you’re not going to see me screaming at a mall or a store.
I’m louder in my own space, that’s why I record in my closet altogether too.
It sucks because I and Zaya have been talking about moving to LA since the summer it’s crazy because we were supposed to fly out in December 2020, book and move at the beginning of January 2021. We were supposed to fly out at the beginning of January 2021, book, move in the middle of January 2021. We’re probably flying out mid-February 2021 booking being there by the end of February. It’s heartbreaking, but at the same time, I understand, because I don’t think anyone thought COVID would last this long. I feel everyone underestimated it.
It’s been not a nice year, but it’s been nice to ground myself more and be home more and spend more family time and stuff. My son is a year older than when we started. It’s crazy. I’m like, “You were a three-year-old.” It’s funny because he doesn’t hang out with any other kids, but he saw his best friend, which is the first time we have seen him in months. It’s funny how they interact differently. I didn’t get to watch him grow up into that.
Especially social media, I don’t think anyone realized this but we are on our phones much more and I feel that’s also why creators, especially on social media, have been doing extremely well. I remember when I first started on TikTok, I was concerned about what times I posted, “This time, I’ll get more interaction.” Now everyone’s on their phone constantly. It doesn’t matter when you post.
Do you still post certain times or no? Do you post every day?
I post every day. I don’t post any specific times. Ideas will come to me and I’m like, “I’ll post.” I tend to post more at night because my brain is geared that way where more ideas at night.
I feel like I post more in the morning and in my morning I’ve been waking up late, 10:30, 11:00. I don’t think it matters what time I post. It’s all over the place.
You post and at this point, it’s weird because I used to be concerned with numbers and posts and I leave the app.
I do the same thing too. I feel I’ve been posting a lot more. I’ll post five videos within an hour and let it go. I don’t want to be on it all day long.You need to learn how to make yourself smile before you can try to make anyone else smile. Click To Tweet
I feel that’s the one bad thing about quarantine though. I am addicted to my phone. I’ll watch movies on my phone. My new favorite game I’m obsessed with, I play Homescapes. It’s like Candy Crush but every level you beat, you gain stars, and those stars are used to renovate your home. If I wanted to change the wallpaper, it would cost two stars. I’d have to beat two levels and I can change the wallpaper. It’s a game that my mom would play, but I’m obsessed.
I cannot wait to see what your place looks like in LA. It is going to be cute.
Zaya and me, we laugh about this all the time. Zaya is girly, pink, purple, and I’m pink, black, dark color girly. Those are my colors. We already know that when we live together, the way our apartment is going to look cute, I don’t think I’m ever going to want to leave. I’m going to be like, “I’m staying here forever. Screw the outside world.”
It’s going to be cute. It would be the best place. People are going to want to come over and take TikToks there.
I was telling her that people are going to come to our apartment and never want to leave. What are the main colors that you’re renovating with? What color schemes do you usually go for?
I don’t like anything brown in my house. Tan, brown, darker colors, I’m not into it. I’m building a house in Wyoming. Since we’ve talked, we bought some land and we’re building a dream custom home. We’re doing ultra-modern cement gray, gray floors and white and black accents. Black doors, black window frames.
If I were to design a home, that would be my style. If I were to build a home, my decor would have pink picture frames. That’s my style. Do you have airplanes?
In the house, if it’s an airplane hangar house, you park your airplane inside the house. There’s a big space you have to build for the airplane and I’m going to paint the ceiling black because it makes it long looking. It’s a cement floor for the airplane.
Do you like the long looking effect?
Yes, like a tall building.
I like that too. When I told Zaya, when we move, I don’t care what windows we have. I want to plant our drapes high up. It gives that elongated effect.
Even the way I placed my flooring and stuff in my house, I always make it look long rather than sideways short. When you walk into the house, the planks go long across the floor.
It goes across the floor. That makes sense in my head too, but when I think of wood flooring, my mom was the type of person where she’s like, “I love dark brown wood flooring.” For some reason in my head, I feel if I were to get wood flooring, I’d want that gray whitish wood flooring.
That’s what I have. We have the same style and I like to switch things up with the décor. This huge flower wall, I’ll do a flower wall over there too. Neon signs, girly stuff, but stuff that can be changed out if you need it to be.
I also like greenery too like vines.
This used to be green and white flowers, and then I got a black bed and it was too dark in here, then I changed it to all white because it was easier to take photos across. I have a neon sign. It says Bunny and the Boys. It’s on a mirrored background. It’s cute. I feel we have the same aesthetic. I tend to like silver accents if there are any metals rather than gold.
In my head, when I think of gold, I don’t mind gold jewelry. If I wear hoops, I like them gold.
Gold doorknobs and stuff, I’m like, “No.”
When I think of gold, I associate it with rust.
Even when we first built our house, my husband wanted to do brown doorknobs, a dark brown. I’m like, “Let me do the design.”
You’re like, “I’m going to take over from here. I can handle this.”
I remember he bought one doorknob, it was for some door or something and he put it on, and I was like, “Return that. I can’t.” We might’ve given it to his ex-wife. It was a code door thing. She wanted to put it on one of her doors so we gave it to her. I’m like, “We’re not doing brown doors.”
I don’t mind gold jewelry. Gold jewelry is beautiful, but when it comes to gold accents, I’m like, “No.”
I feel silver goes better. It goes with the gray floor. It’s a cool tone.
We have our white and gray, silver fits better. Gold would set everything off.
Do you like the cement-y look too?
I love the cement look. I used to be into brick. I was like, “I love the brick look.” If I want to move to an apartment in New York City because I wanted to live in New York City for the longest time, I would want to have a brick accent wall. As I’ve grown up, I said, “I don’t like brick.” If I would have anything, I’d want cement, but I’d want it at least a little laminated, not to the point where it’s shiny, but to the point where it was reflective.
I have an epoxy silver floor in my garage, it’s mixed in and it’s got all different kinds of tones and it’s super cute. It’s slippery though. I don’t necessarily recommend it, but it’s cute. If it gets a drop of water on it, you’re fine.
I fell down the stairs. My stairs are rugs. My entire house is rugged. I got these new socks and when you wear socks for the first time, they’re always slippery. I was walking down the stairs. Thank God I had it on video too, because I was Snapchatting my friend Riley. As I was Snapchatting her, I was on the phone. My AirPods were connected to my MacBook and my MacBook was in my room, I was on the phone with Zaya and I’m walking down the stairs and all Zaya heard was me falling down the stairs. My mom was like, “Are you okay? Do I have to take you to the hospital?” It’s gone but I had a bruise all up and down my arm.
Have you ever seen that movie? It’s a documentary series on Netflix. It’s about the lady who fell down the stairs and killed herself. They tried to get the husband for it, and the husband said, “We were drunk. She was by herself.” It always scares me. I’m scared about my son walking down the stairs by himself. I hate it.
Especially if the flooring is slippery.
Ours is hardwood.You need to love yourself before loving anyone else. Click To Tweet
If you’re wearing socks, forget it.
I hate it. It’s scary. I almost put grips on our stairs.
I wouldn’t blame you at all. Those pads on every step?
I didn’t do it. We don’t wear socks because it’s warmer here, but I don’t think last winter, maybe I’m sure he was walking. I used to not let him go down the stairs at all by himself. I try not to let him wear socks in the house anyway because even on our floors everywhere, he can slip and fall down anyways because there’s hardwood everywhere.
I was such a clumsy kid. Growing up, I fell everywhere I got hurt all the time. In fact, growing up, my baby teeth, thank God they fell out. I ran into a wall. I went to the dentist and they couldn’t fix my tooth. It was somehow chipped or stained. I had this white line across the top of my tooth and then down. It looked white down here and regular color up here.
It was probably dead. At least it wasn’t Brown.
No, thank God. I have braces.
My son has big lips as I do. Between when he was 1 and 2, he probably had ten busted lips. He would fall and knock his lips open and bleed everywhere. I’m glad it wasn’t his teeth.
I’m fortunate that I have lips and paper cut lips, my entire family, no lips.
Did you get them from your daddy?
I might because my dad is Italian. I feel like that might have had something to do with my lips.
My dad’s side of the family is Polish and they always call their last name lips because everyone has big lips. My son has them too.
I’ve seen your son on the videos, that video that was cute. You were getting on the jet or the plane. He was like, “I’m with my bunnies.” I was like, “He’s cute.” He looks like you.
If you were to see pictures of me when I was little, he looks the same exact as me except for tan and curly hair. I had straight hair. He has the same hair as you. It’s super curly.
I remember learning about this in biology in my freshman year of high school. The oldest child or the first child usually inherits more of the mother’s traits, the youngest inherits the father’s and the middle child has a mixture of both.
When my son was born, he looked more like my husband when he was a newborn. As soon as he grew up, he looked like me, but someone told me before that they look like the husband or the man when they first come out. Back in the old times, there was no way to tell who the dad was so that the newborns would look at the dad more when they’re firstborn. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but it makes sense.
It doesn’t have to be true. That sounds cool.
How do you get confidence? How do you have some self-love advice?
This is the best advice that I’ve ever been given. My public speaking teacher in high school, I used to go to her and cry to her all the time because, one, I didn’t like my body in high school. Two, I had friends, but not many of them. I didn’t know what I was doing with my life. I remember going to her with issues or problems and crying. On my last day of class with her, she handed me a note and it’s the best advice I’ve ever been given. I say this to all my friends whenever they’re like, “I don’t feel confident in myself.” This only thing she told me. Everyone has heard this before. “You need to start living for yourself. Stop trying to make others happy because if you’re making others happy and you’re not happy, it’s a spiral effect.”
You need to learn how to make yourself smile before you can try to make anyone else smile. The same thing goes with relationships too. You need to love yourself before loving anyone else. I was heavy in high school. I weighed 215 pounds. I lost much weight since high school and I have loose skin and that’s the one thing I’ve always been insecure about is my stomach area. For the first time in a long time, I’ve been saving my money and I’m going to do something for myself and make myself happy. I called a plastic surgeon and I have my consultation on January 4, 2021, for a tummy tuck and loose skin removal surgery. I’m excited. Especially because we follow each other on Instagram, if you see me on Instagram, every time I wear a skirt, or every time I wear jeans, always high-waisted. It’s because I have loose skin and I hide it well because I’ve lived with it for several years. I want to wear crop tops. I can wear them, but I want to wear crop tops and be able to show off my tummy. I’m not saying I can’t, which I can. It’s just I’m insecure about it.
You shouldn’t pay for that because I’m sure there are a lot of places that would do it for free for you.
I was thinking about talking to the plastic surgeon and asking, “I do social media. If I promoted your office and I made a video about it and did a before and after, could I possibly have a discount?”
I know a few plastic surgeons and med spa people and they’ll do it for free for you, 100%.
Even if the plastic surgeon was like, “I don’t do stuff like that.” The plastic surgeon I’m going to was recommended to me by my family doctor. He is one of the best plastic surgeons that I have come across in New Jersey. I highly recommend him. Five-star rating. I was looking at the before and after photos of this woman who got a loose skin tummy tuck surgery with him. It was like night and day. You could barely tell and I’m praying to God that my surgery ends up hopefully as good as hers.
It’s sad that our bodies can’t absorb the skin after you lose weight. Many people go through weight loss and being healthier and it’s sad that they have to live with their body which is not cooperating the same way.
What sucks the most is you usually are always told, especially by doctors when you’re little, if you’re heavy as a toddler, they say that is your time. I remember the doctors telling my mom this, they’d always be like, “Spencer is heavy for his age. Make sure that he’s eating the right foods to prevent loose skin.” When you’re little, your skin is elastic. When you’re getting taller, your skin stretches out. You lose weight. You’re good. I am young, but I lost weight in high school. The reason why you don’t have loose skin as a toddler growing up is that your body is growing. It’s lengthening out, your skin stretches with your body. It’s a more natural weight loss. I was already 5’10” when I lost all my weight.
What did you do to lose weight?
At first, I started going to the gym and I noticed results, but I was like, “I’m not getting the ones I want.” I started restricting my eating. I was like, “I’m getting results now.” I started restricting it tight to the point where I wouldn’t eat for a day or two at a time and then I would binge eat. When I would binge, I would get upset with myself and then work out the next two days, no eating. I ended up having to go to therapy because I developed an anorexic binge eating disorder. Luckily, every day is a recovery journey. There are days where I feel like I can’t eat because people don’t understand, I hate it on social media when people are like, “If I want to be skinny, I’m not going to eat.”
That type of mindset will destroy your body. I remember binge eating and my stomach itself, when you restrict your eating, your stomach shrinks. I would eat much and when I say I would I mean like a regular meal to a normal person and I wouldn’t even be able to hold my food down. I wouldn’t make myself throw up. My body was not used to eating food, it would purge itself on its own. I remember I would eat in the kitchen at 12:00 AM and I would wash the dishes and I would hold onto the sink and start dry heaving because my body was like, “You ate too much. This is too much food.” I would run to the bathroom and I would throw up and I couldn’t control it. Luckily, I started going to therapy and my therapist was telling me, this is another thing that helped me out. I had to stop viewing food as a reward for losing weight. If I lost 5 pounds, that wasn’t my time to be like, “I can eat.” Eat when you’re hungry, eat what you need to eat, but don’t restrict everything because it’s terrible. It’s bad.
Thank you for sharing this because I feel like we don’t talk about boys or men having diet and eating disorders. It’s solely on girls. This is such a powerful message you’re sending by talking about this. I’ll have girls comment on my videos and be like, “I didn’t want to eat today anyways.” That makes me feel bad because I don’t want people to be skinny like me. Everyone should love their body the way that it is. Feed your body with healthy foods and things like nutritious foods, regardless of what size your body is, it’s not about size. People always ask me what my diet is. I hate saying the word diet because I don’t want you to diet, restrict your eating. My diet is eating vegan and healthy foods and vegetables and carbs, but other than that, I don’t like the word diet, it makes me think that people think that I’m on a diet, which I’m not.
It’s upsetting when people come and like, “I wasn’t going to eat today anyways.” That shows how much society has pushed onto girls and boys at such a young age. Taylor Swift had a video about this. She was like, “If your stomach is flat enough, your ass isn’t big enough. If your ass is big enough, your stomach isn’t flat enough.” It’s unattainable. The way we push the ideal perfect body that people must have to be attractive to everyone is terrible. I feel a lot of gay men especially develop eating disorders. A lot of the time men in the gay community are picky. I even remember my friends telling me, “I’ll be on a dating app and someone will ask me, do you have a six-pack?” If they were like, “No, I’m skinny.” They will be like, “Bye.” It’s too much. People shouldn’t hold themselves up to the standard of what society feels attractiveness is and what isn’t. It’s all subjective. Everything, beauty is subjective. Someone might look at me and be like, “You’re ugly.” Someone else might look at me and be like, “I wish I looked like him.”
Half of my comments are like, “I love your body. I wish I looked like you. You’re an icon. You’re the ideal body type.” The other half is like, “You need to eat. Your husband doesn’t feed you. You’re anorexic.” I’ve been body shamed because mostly I do talking videos that are here, but then I get dressed up and I make a video and half of them are body-shaming me, which I don’t have a problem with my body. I’m at an age. It probably would have bothered me when I was younger. I’m married. I’m not impressing you with my body. I’m not looking for a man.Every day is a recovery journey. Click To Tweet
My body is not here to impress you. It’s not for you. It’s for me. My body is my body. My favorite video is of this girl, and she was like, “Yes, I am fat, but I am still gorgeous. God gave me this body because He knew that I could handle it and I would love it the way He gave it to me.” She was like, “I’m wearing this turtleneck, I’m wearing these pants, I have a stomach, and I still look good as fuck because God gave me this body. He knew that I could handle it and I would love it the way he gave it to me.”
It’s sad that we’re trying to be this body type with a skinny girl with plastic surgery. I got a comment that said, “If you’re wealthy and you have money, how come you don’t have fake tits yet?” I’m like, “I don’t want fake tits.” Why are we pushing that on women? What is wrong with people? Why are you saying that? It’s the same kind of people that write I should have plastic surgery or the same kind of people that comment on the Kardashians and they’re like, “They’re plastic. They’re going to float in the ocean because they’re plastic.” I don’t understand why we are pushing plastic surgery on people. If you want to get it, good, that makes you feel better about your body, but we shouldn’t be saying that. We make people insecure to get plastic surgery then they get it, they’re still shamed for it.
It makes me mad especially with the Kardashians, regardless of whether they got plastic surgery or not, that’s none of my business. I hate it when people are like, “They promote self-love and loving your body, but they’ve got plastic surgery.” They did something that made them happy. They did something that made them more confident. Maybe they didn’t like their bodies before and that’s okay, but because someone got plastic surgery does not mean that they shouldn’t be able to promote loving yourself, loving your body, loving who you are.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard any of them say that. I don’t think that they promote that they’re like, “This is me. This is my new body.”
The main person they attack is Kourtney.
She doesn’t have any plastic surgery. She has a boob job.
Khloe has a dietary program. People are like, “How can you promote being who you are and loving your body if you’ve gotten plastic surgery?” One, it’s none of your business if she’s had plastic surgery. Two, she can still get plastic surgery and promote loving your body.
How does getting plastic surgery make you not love your body? It will make you love your body even more. Whatever people want to get done, it’s fine. I’ve had fillers, I’ve had Botox, who cares? I want to look eighteen forever.
If I want to get plastic surgery and I want to look I am nineteen for the rest of my life, no one’s going to stop me and I can still get on TikTok and be like, “Promote love.” Do you know what else made me mad? Everyone who attacked Madison Beer. Everyone was like, “She’s had Botox in her lips. How can she promote?” I’m sitting there like, “The photos that you’re bringing up are when she was thirteen.” I didn’t have lips when I was thirteen. I had paper cut lips. I didn’t get my lips until after I had braces and started going through puberty. You are in no position to be like, “She had plastic surgery because she has lips now.” If she did, mind your business.
Is she getting attacked because she’s beautiful? Why are you obsessed with it? Who cares?
People make a big deal about it because one, she’s gorgeous, and two, I don’t want to sit here and be like, “She’s the ideal.” If you were to walk a runway and see models, Madison Beer would be one of the people on the runway. When people were attacking her and they’re like, “Why is she?” No. That’s the one thing that always confuses me is when people automatically associate getting plastic surgery to someone hating their body. No one ever said that getting plastic surgery means that you hate your body. It means you might be insecure about something and you want to get it fixed or it means that you want to enhance a certain part of your body that you love. I know I keep saying this because you get plastic surgery that in no way means that you automatically don’t promote self-love. If anything, it means you love yourself enough to want to get something done on yourself to make you happier. That in my opinion is self-love.
Everyone is judgmental. Sometimes I feel like TikTok is supportive. Sometimes it’s negative. That whole thing that happened with Charli, they didn’t even fucking do anything wrong. They were being normal teenagers. There are pedophiles on TikTok. They’re making silly dinner conversations.
My video got taken down. A lot of people’s videos got taken down because of death threats that they were getting. That’s probably why. It got taken down for hate speech. This is the thing, especially on the internet, people will take and twist your words. Charli never once said that she didn’t appreciate her following. She said that she would be happy if she hit 100 million on the same day she hit 1 million. Dixie, they were close with the chef. No one knows the relationship with them. The chef even publicly came out and said, “I view these girls like family. I gave them food that they wouldn’t like because I knew that’s how they would react.” Also, it’s reality TV.
It’s on YouTube. It’s not like everything people do on YouTube.
Everything is planned. If I was on reality TV and a chef handed me snails, I’m nineteen, if I put snails in my mouth and I didn’t like it, I would spit it out too. Charli asked for Dino nuggets. The thing that threw me off the most, and don’t get me wrong, everyone online is allowed to have their own opinion. Everyone can have their own opinion, but the fact that a 30-something-year-old woman was attacking children and dragging them for no reason, I understand, you can be upset with the situation. The thing that made me mad about that. I made the video and someone in his comments was like, “Why didn’t you duet it?” The only reason I know about this is that I have a spam account and I didn’t know about the video. He blocked me. People in my comments being like, “Perez used your audio.” I went to my spam, saw his video and someone commented, “Why didn’t you duet?” Perez goes, “He has me blocked.” I blocked him after he blocked me. He blocked me on TikTok. Do you want to know why he blocked me? I made a video when I had one million followers and it was of me pretending that I had a nightmare. It was a video of Perez Hilton in a cat costume.
This was an old video?
This was when I had one million followers on TikTok. My video got taken down for bullying. When I went to his account, I was blocked. He’s had me blocked for several months. I blocked him back because I was like, “Whatever.” When I was at my spam and I went to his comments and people were like, “Why didn’t you duet him?” He was like, “He was scared and has me blocked.” I’m not scared of you, you old man. You blocked me.
Why would he block you? He started TikTok and started fighting with Charli a long time ago?
In my opinion, do what you want to do with your life. I’m not going to sit here and bash Perez Hilton, but I will say that I feel there are several people in this world who had their prime, their prime is over and the only way they can remain relevant is by inserting themselves into the drama that does not concern them whatsoever.
It’s sad because I don’t think that Charli and Dixie deserve it. I made a video on this, it did not get taken down. I don’t understand why everyone’s mad at them for not wanting the food. That’s a chef’s job. If I’m a bad driver, I’m not going to go be an Uber driver. It was set up, I’m not even saying that the guy’s a bad cook, but let’s say it wasn’t set up. If you’re a bad cook, why are you being a chef? I had a chef for four years, five days a week, every day, every meal in my house. There have been 100 meals out of that that weren’t good. I’ve left my house, didn’t eat the meal and went to McDonald’s and ordered French fries. She ordered Dino nuggets. It’s fine. That’s his job. He’s at their house.
The fact that people are sitting there, they’re making it seem like he was there and he wasn’t getting paid. He’s getting paid. It’s his job. He’s getting paid regardless of whether she eats the snails or not. I even remember saying, “Regardless of whether you liked Dixie’s reaction or Charli’s reaction or not, at the end of the day, sending them death threats over not wanting to eat snails is excessive.”
I also don’t understand why there isn’t more security, police-wise, if you send someone a death threat, you should be prosecuted. That is not okay.
I’ve had death threats before.
For what though?
A lot of people a lot of the time don’t like you as a person so they wish death on you. I had this one person tag me on Twitter and it was a voice memo of them saying that they wish that they could hate-crime me. The crazy experience I’ve ever had was someone DM-ed me. This is insane. They DM-ed me a video of an actual human being stoned in a different country and said, “I wish this was you.” That’s the most extreme. Someone DM-ed me on Instagram and said, “The reason you’re probably the way you are is that you were most likely molested as a child.” I used to respond to all of my DMs. In the beginning when I had one million followers, if I go to my regular DMs, I have my DMs from friends and then my general DMs, I have hundreds of general DMs because I used to DM my followers back. I don’t look at my requests anymore. I go to my top requests because top requests are usually brands that want to collaborate with me. I can’t check them anymore because I get death threats. I get told terrible things. I get sent videos. It’s terrible.
Why can’t the police say, “You cannot say this stuff online.” It should be a crime. It’s the same thing as if you’re sending someone’s nudes out there, it’s even worse. You’re wishing and saying that you want to harm someone. Didn’t someone show up at your house one time?
I was once on my TikTok Live, you could hear them on my live. I had to get off my Instagram Live because someone was shouting my name out my window. My mom turned off all the lights in the house. I was terrified. Thank God I have a blackout curtain.
You didn’t see who it was?
No. Thank God I have blackout curtains. I have those curtains where when you close the blinds, no light escapes.
Your mom heard them too?
They were screaming outside my house, on the sidewalk. My mom had to turn off all the lights. My mom was like, “Spencer, thank God all the blinds were closed because it’s nighttime. No one can look in the house and see if you’re in your room or your home.” She was like, “Don’t say anything on TikTok.”
Do you think it was a fan?
I know it was a fan, but I don’t know who it was. It was insane. It was terrifying. Was I doxed? Are people going to show up at my house? I’m not the only person who lives here. My mom lives here too. I don’t want her walking out of the house and being harassed by strangers.My body is not here to impress you. It's not for you. It's for me. My body is my body. Click To Tweet
I had to call the police. I had something similar happened to me too. It was girls who like me, I don’t want to put their stuff out there, but it was not safe. People have a hard time dealing with other people that want privacy a bit. They think that because you’re putting some source of your life out there that you deserve to have everything out there.
I made a TikTok about the guy that I’m talking to. I didn’t say his name because people always invade my privacy, especially when it comes to that stuff. People will go to the biggest lengths. I got over 50 DMs from all of my friends that I follow on Instagram sending me screenshots of DMs from the same two people of them being like, “Are you dating Spencewuah?” They went to every man I follow on Instagram and asked them if I was dating them. Thank God the guy I’m talking to, did he get one of those DMs? Yes. I told all my friends don’t respond. If it was one person, I couldn’t talk about it because I can’t be like, “They messaged the person I was talking to.” No, they messaged every man I follow on Instagram. I’m sitting here like, “Jokes on you because yes you did DM the right one, but no, he’s not responding and none of them are.” No one’s going to know.
One of my friends DM-ed them back like, “Can’t you accept his privacy?” The person messaged them back. He DM-ed them one of my videos and said, “Are you dating Spencer?” My friend was like, “Shouldn’t you let him date whoever he wants to date without having to know.” He was like, “No. I love to know. LOL. It makes it interesting to see if I’m right.” My friend was like, “That’s a little creepy.” He goes, “Have a good day. Also, sorry, I sound like a stalker, but I went to the same school as Spencer, believe it or not.” I went to this person’s Instagram, they go to the school that I went to, but we weren’t in the same school at the same time.
They’re in your high school?
He goes to the high school I went to, but I’m sitting here like, “What do you mean, ‘I went to the same high school as Spencer?’ You didn’t go there, past tense. You are there. You’re all freshmen and I graduated several years ago. You’re a stalker, that’s creepy to me.” I love how this went from us talking to you about home décor to me talking about how I have stalkers and get death threats.
I have to have you back for another time because this has been a great time.
Yes, please. I love this.
We should do a group one with me, you and Zaya.
I’ll tell her.
I’m going to end this with two questions that I ask my son every night before he goes to bed. The first one is, what was the best part of your day?
The best part of my day, I shopped online. I love shopping. I got this cute Hello Kitty necklace. I got a cute pink cardigan crop top.
The pink cardigan crop top was from Forever 21 and I usually don’t shop there but it was cute. I was like, “It’s Black Friday. Let me see.” The necklace was from Depop.
The second question is, what did you learn?
I learned that everyone online goes through the same fucking experiences because I was saying shit and you were like, “Me too.” I’m used to talking to my close friends about it and they’re like, “That happens to me all the time.” This is the first time I’ve spoken to since I was working at Starbucks.
We are going to hop off. I’m going to have a little private conversation with Spencer after and thank you everyone for joining us. I’m sure everyone already follows you, but can you tell them your at and where to find you?
My at on everything is @Spencewuah.
We will be back for another.